As a teenager, I was blessed with the opportunity to travel through Europe with my three sisters. Early on in that trip, we decided that when something “bad” or unexpected happened, we would look at it as an adventure. 2024 has been full of adventures. I’ve made some significant changes in my personal life and continue to work on rebuilding my health. This has impacted (and will continue to impact) Parent Road Ministries.
My biggest struggle has been figuring out how to honor the Lord while maintaining a healthy balance between caring for myself, caring for others, and doing the work God has called me to do. Figuring out that balance takes a lifetime, but I aim to get closer as I learn and grow.
I have worked hard over the years to become as efficient and productive as possible, squeezing as much as possible out of my time. (Here are some of my favorite books on productivity.)
The Lord had been trying to get me to slow down for years, but I only half-heartedly listened. So, in 2021, the Lord took away my health and strength and forced me to rest. Since then, I’ve been learning the importance of rest and balance. Sleep and rest are not for the weak; sleep and rest are for the healthy. These are hard lessons for a recovering workaholic! And I don’t always get it right.
It comes down to priorities. What are the most important things to you right now? We can’t do everything, no matter how much we want to, and important things are neglected when we try to do too much.
It’s also important to take some time to decide for yourself what is most important to you. This helps when people ask you to do things. Does it fit what is important to you? Is God calling you to do it? If the answer to both is yes, go for it! If not, then saying yes will take away time, energy, and resources from what you should be doing.
Put another way, saying “yes” to good things can make you so busy that you have to say “no” to the best things. I need to tell myself that again. Saying “yes” to good things can make you so busy that you have to say “no” to the best things.
It reminds me of the Eisenhower Matrix. Have you heard of it? It divides tasks into four quadrants:
- Urgent and important: Clear deadlines and emergencies that need immediate attention (like a busted water pipe in your house).
- Urgent and not important: Busy work that needs to get done, but anyone can do it (like preparing meals).
- Not urgent and important: Things we tend to procrastinate on doing (like spending time with your family, Bible reading, prayer, going to church, exercising, and taking care of yourself).
- Not urgent and not important: Distractions that serve no purpose (like scrolling through social media).
What “not urgent and important” things do you need to reprioritize? How about me?
Since I’ve been rebuilding my health, my energy is limited, like a battery with very little juice. It’s forced me to be intentional in how I spend that energy: mental, physical, emotional, and spiritual. I’ve learned the hard way that I cannot care for other people if I do not first take care of myself. So, I’ve built up the capacity to cook, exercise appropriately, read my Bible, and do the basics around the house. It’s not perfect every day, but it’s a priority.
Now, I am able to expand what I can do beyond the basics. In some ways, this stage is harder because there are so many more options and things I want to do. I have to keep reminding myself that I cannot do everything.
One of the most helpful things I’m learning is to focus on one (or two) major project(s) or goal(s) at a time. This is a challenge for me because I have more that I want to do, and I don’t seem to be able to finish anything fast enough. This leads me to push harder to finish faster at the expense of other things (including my health). I’m learning that the long-term price isn’t worth the short-term ga
Several times over the last year, I needed to step back and prayerfully reevaluate my priorities. Lord, what should I be focusing on right now? What should I put on the list to consider when I finish my current project?
I’ll be honest. Sometimes, it feels like I’m failing, like I’m not good enough, and I’m not doing enough. Then I remember verses like 2 Corinthians 12:9-10. “But he said to me, ‘My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness.’ Therefore I will boast all the more gladly about my weaknesses, so that Christ’s power may rest on me. That is why, for Christ’s sake, I delight in weaknesses, in insults, in hardships, in persecutions, in difficulties. For when I am weak, then I am strong.”
I also remember that the Lord is the one who holds the world together, not me. “The Son is the image of the invisible God, the firstborn over all creation. For in him all things were created: things in heaven and on earth, visible and invisible, whether thrones or powers or rulers or authorities; all things have been created through him and for him. He is before all things, and in him all things hold together” (Col. 1:15-17).
I cannot earn God’s love and grace, nor can you. “For it is by grace you have been saved, through faith—and this is not from yourselves, it is the gift of God— not by works, so that no one can boast. For we are God’s handiwork, created in Christ Jesus to do good works, which God prepared in advance for us to do” (Eph. 2:8-10).
The Lord calls us to work hard but also to rest in Him. Jesus said in Matt. 11:28-30, “Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you and learn from me, for I am gentle and humble in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. For my yoke is easy and my burden is light.”
Why am I making hard what He has made light? Why am I adding more to my plate than He has asked me to take? What do I have on my plate that I need to release?
Will you pray with me one of my favorite prayers? “Lord, show me what I need to do, not do, and stop doing to best honor and serve You. Give me the courage and strength to follow what You tell me to do. Change my heart and my desires to match Yours. I give You my everything, Lord Jesus. Amen.”